SPIRITUAL GUIDANCE: Seek goodness, not happiness in life

We are victims of an inborn erroneous notion translated into a cultural delusion: that we exist in order to be happy.

At midnight, Dec. 31, we wish one another a “Happy” New Year. But at the New Year of Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur, Jewish people wish one another a “Good” New Year.

Happiness is not always in our power to achieve, is often dependent on the decisions of others and is fleeting. Goodness lies within our control, arises from within and finds its permanence in God’s salvific plan.

Happiness is not readily attainable, not easily sustainable and not very reliable. Pascal Bruckner wrote, “To declare that we resolve to be happy is unreasonable. We cannot determine to be happy. We cannot order up happiness as we order a dish in a restaurant or command a dog to come at our call. Happiness eludes the rendezvous we fix and disappears when we think we have it in hand.”

Certainly our society, which places pleasure above discipline and desire above responsibility, has not brought happiness.

While we all wish for happy days, life’s central quest should be for goodness. True happiness, characterized by equanimity and serenity, is an outgrowth of decency, kindness and righteousness. It is the inner contentment arising from the knowledge that life is not here to cater to us, but we are here to make life good.

If we confuse happiness with enjoyment, believe it is found in externals, are preoccupied with self, push God to the periphery, lack gratitude and search for happiness only in distant places, we will never experience it. Happiness is not a psychological emotion, but a spiritual state of being. Happiness is created through our service to others here and now and by being perpetually appreciative.

Happiness often entails letting ourselves go, while goodness entails bringing ourselves under control. Happiness often means reaching out for the things we want, while goodness means reaching up for the things we need. Happiness is often sought in a change of scene, while goodness is sought through a change of heart.