IN THE MIX:

It was time for my daughter to move on to fourth grade and I was pretty frightened. A number of people at Sonora Elementary School were telling me that Davis Elementary School was scary. They said there was bullying there and it had a negative atmosphere.

I just wanted my girl to be safe. I would ask one teacher and she would say that it was a little rough, then I’d talk to a parent and she would say that she pulled her son out to home school him because of bullying, then I talked to another who said her daughter goes there and she has no problem.

I talked to my daughter’s teacher and she said not to worry. I asked her if I should consider private school. We decided it wasn’t necessary.

She ended up at Davis with Jaymi Ropp for a teacher. The woman is amazing. She instructs other teachers and uses the most up-to-date education techniques. My daughter loves it at Davis and so far hasn’t had any issues with being intimidated by anyone.

Good for us, but our positive experience doesn’t mean there aren’t real problems to deal with in our schools. I’m just not sure what or how bad those problems are.

After my experience I wondered if what I had been hearing about TeWinkle Middle School was fact or fiction. It’s amazing that a school that makes you giggle when you say its name conjures up so much ire. I was contacted by two TeWinkle and Estancia High School moms and my exploration into the conundrum that is the Newport-Mesa middle school education system began.

Kathy Miller and Julie Leahy told me they are sick and tired of people questioning their parenting because they haven’t pulled their kids out of their neighborhood schools. They are also tired of losing the sense of community on their street because the neighbor children attend private schools or schools across town.

They have plenty to say about how well a student can do at both TeWinkle and Estancia.

So I have heard the rumors. I have seen the test scores. I have talked to parents and principals. I have visited campuses. I still don’t have an answer to why TeWinkle is so scary. I do know the school is struggling with low test scores for the socio-economically disadvantaged students and apparently has had issues with violence in the past, but I can’t find what that violence was, except the MySpace.com/hate crime incident.

Why do they have problems with test scores? Wong said the answer lies with the parents, but he also said the problem is one found across the board.

“It crosses all boundaries, all genders, all races, all economics,” he said.

That one will be extremely hard for some to believe, but it’s what Wong sees at Ensign.

TeWinkle Principal Dan Diehl, who will move on to Costa Mesa Middle School in July, said he does see a difference in the school based on the socio-economic status of families.

He said that though most of the students speak English and have been in the Newport-Mesa district since kindergarten, some are dealing with a home life that hinders studying.

He gave three examples of issues some of these children deal with. When they go home there are no parents to supervise because they are both working sometimes two or three jobs. Or they go home and have four siblings to take care of, or they live in a multi-family home and the environment is not conducive to doing homework.

He is diplomatically and I think realistically clear that it is not an issue of race but of culture. I’d go a step further and say it is more an issue of economic status.

Whatever the reason, I still have to be concerned about the best choice for my kids. One of the hardest questions I’ve had for myself is this: If my daughter gets close to the highest test score possible at her school but most of the kids get low scores, would she be better off at a school at which most of the kids get high scores?

“It depends on what you want for your kid,” Wong says.

OK, well, I want her to have all the chances that the rest of the kids have. I want her to be safe. I want her to have friends who have similar interests and who value her. I don’t want her to be surrounded by drugs or people who value cars more than friendship. Where do I find that magic school?

Since I don’t believe in magic anymore, I’m going to go ahead and deal with reality. In reality, the schools my children attend seem to be helping them grow. Another reality is that we have schools that have students who are struggling. At TeWinkle they have accepted that reality, too, and spend a lot of time trying to change it.

Because it’s pretty clear that parents have the most impact on their children’s education, the schools work hard to get parents involved.

In order to respond to concerns about violence on campus, Diehl said the administrative team has a strong presence on campus and that they work to keep kids active during lunch with sports competitions.

“They need structure, activity and supervision,” he said. “When they don’t have that they make bad decisions.”

I can’t include everything TeWinkle, Ensign or the district is doing to help the children in our schools in this week’s column anymore than I can include everything that needs our attention. I can say that the problem is complicated and is something we have to deal with rationally.

I have yet to encounter or hear facts to back the scary elements that I’ve heard about. I’ve heard that if you are a high achiever in school you will be that high achiever at whichever school you attend. I am concerned, however, about the average and low-achieving students.

It’s those students who seem to need some extra help. We can ignore it and even get mad at it, but in the end we have to support those who are doing something about it.