Let’s see how all this computes

Two weeks ago it was nine of the top 25 teams losing.

Last week it was Stanford apple-carting everybody-loved-Pete’s USC in maybe the biggest upset in college history.

Saturday it was Kentucky shocking top-ranked Louisiana State in triple overtime, No. 2 California staring No. 1 (for the first time since 1951) in the facemask before unraveling at home to Oregon State when Cal’s backup quarterback inexplicably let time expire before kicker Jordan Kay could possibly send the game to overtime.

It was No. 10 USC making Sun Bowl plans before getting resuscitated by a true freshman (Joe McKnight) and a backup quarterback (Mark Sanchez).

And UCLA, which did not play, which meant another week to implement its emergency quarterback package, is still 3-0 in the Pacific 10 Conference.

And, other than that Saturday, your local library was quieter.

And today we turn this load of lies, damn lies and statistics over to the notorious Bowl Championship Series, which will release its first standings and then wait for the blowback.

Ohio State, which plays in the same Big Ten Conference that allowed Michigan to lose to Appalachian State, and Northwestern to Duke, appears destined to debut in the BCS’s top spot basically as no one outside of Columbus was paying attention.

And Boston College, which turned 1-5 Notre Dame into 1-6, will be No. 2.

That’s right; you can’t spell BCS without BC -- how many times have you heard that?

And South Florida, which started its program 11 years ago with a box and directions, could be No. 3, only a heartbeat from the BCS crown room.

The Bulls are already getting the hang of this impress-the-BCS judges idea, as they, one day before the first BCS release, dropped 64 points on Central Florida.

And you thought two weeks ago was the craziest thing you’ve seen since last week.

And now you’ve seen this week.

Just as last week’s USC loss reverberated at the Rose Bowl, where UCLA and Notre Dame were exchanging glances, the announcement of LSU’s triple-overtime loss almost caused an earthquake in Berkeley..

The LSU upset elicited a halftime exit question from a Versus cable sideline reporter to Cal Coach Jeff Tedford, whose team was clinging to a 14-13 lead.

Tedford was playing without starting quarterback Nate Longshore, still hobbled by the ankle injury suffered two weeks ago at Oregon.

“We’ve got other things to worry about right here,� a somewhat perplexed Tedford said.

No kidding.

Final score: Oregon State 31, Cal 28.

The LSU and Cal defeats turned the chase for this year’s national title into the Looney Tunes and only a fool or Lou Holtz would try to say which two teams will be on top Dec. 2.

It might be true that Ohio State and Boston College control their destinies, but this year, how long until control is lost?

Ohio State still has the meat of its schedule to play (Penn State, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan) while Boston College, after a bye, plays at Virginia Tech.

It’s not over for the one-loss teams, which include LSU, South Carolina, Oklahoma, Oregon, Cal, West Virginia, Kentucky and, yes, USC.

Just as USC didn’t fall out of contention after its loss to Stanford, neither does LSU after its no-can-do at Kentucky.

Kentucky will probably vault from No. 17 back into the top 10, but has Florida coming to Lexington next week.

USC, as beat-up and pedestrian as it looked against Arizona, kept its BCS chances alive with Saturday’s comeback victory.

It’ll be interesting to see what kind of treatment USC gets now. Last week, after the Stanford loss, the Trojans dropped only six spots, to No. 7, in the USA Today coaches’ and Harris polls.

Will pollsters be as forgiving to USC after a win?

USC was already lagging in early BCS projections, ranking No. 13 in one mock index. Yet, USC has plenty of schedule punch to move back up, with key away games remaining at Oregon, Cal and Arizona State.

And what becomes of Hawaii, trying to go undefeated and earn an automatic BCS bid by finishing in the top 12?

Hawaii had to rally to defeat San Jose State, in overtime, on Friday. Last time the Warriors scored an overtime road win, at Louisiana Tech, they dropped five spots in the AP poll.

After the close call against San Jose State, Hawaii Coach June Jones said, “I’m of the belief that winning these type of games does more for you than winning a game 70-0.�

Not when you’re trying to make a BCS bowl they don’t.

This is the 10th season for the BCS and chances are this may not be a happy anniversary. The BCS was formed to help match a No. 1 vs. No. 2 in a sport that has rebuffed all playoff notions. The BCS standings are two parts human polls, one part computers and one part seeing what sticks when you throw it all against the wall.

There have been only four relatively “clean� conclusions -- 1998, ‘99, 2002 and 2005 -- with the others representing various parts of Georgia Tech’s nickname: Ramblin’ Wrecks.

In 2000, Miami was No. 2 in both polls but got edged out for the No. 2 BCS spot by Florida State, a school it beat.

The next year, Oregon was No. 2 in both polls and finished No. 4.

In 2003, USC finished No. 1 in both polls but didn’t even earn the right to play for the BCS title, but the Trojans did earn a split title.

In 2004, undefeated Auburn got left out, while the BCS points fight between Texas and California got so ugly the Associated Press pulled its poll out of the BCS.

Last year, of course, gave us the Michigan or Florida argument in the screaming match over which team deserved to play No. 1 Ohio State.

The first BCS standings are coming out today, and guess which team from Columbus is going to be No. 1?

Better fasten your team’s banner to something sturdy.

We wouldn’t recommend, though, a Harris pole.

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