Feud With a Mayor? It’s Not the O.C. Way

First thing Friday morning, a couple of my editors (it takes a village to raise a columnist), approached. They’re more dangerous when hunting in pairs, but, call it instinct, I didn’t try to give them the slip.

“Maybe you could have some fun with the Trib and this story in Chicago,” one said, as the other nodded.

Hmm. Have some fun with the Trib. You mean the company that owns this newspaper and signs my paycheck? Yeah, sounds like there’s potential for huge laughs.

I put my feet up on the desk and began researching the story. Turns out that the Windy City tale is one of intrigue involving politics, baseball and the media. Those are the only three subjects in the world that interest me, so I began stroking my chin and dug in deeper.

The drama begins in Wrigley Field, the venerable ballpark where baseball has been played since 1914. Anything that old needs maintenance, a point reinforced during a game last month when a 6-by-3-inch chunk of concrete fell from the upper reaches of the ballpark and just missed a 5-year-old boy. I’ve probably seen 20 games in Wrigley and never thought anything could ruin my enjoyment of a game there, but getting nailed by flying concrete would give me pause.

Chicago Mayor Richard Daley had the same thought and took the ballpark’s owners to task for not having the proper permits when they made previous repairs.

And here’s where the story gets good: The Cubs’ owner is none other than the Tribune Co., which in addition to owning The Times also owns the Chicago Tribune, a newspaper that often mixes it up with Daley.

Seeing an opening, the mayor suggested that the Tribune editorial writers would have had a field day with any other owner that had goofed like that.

The Tribune, in what an editor said was “purely a coincidence,” later filed a federal request to get maintenance records for Daley’s City Hall. That prompted Daley, in turn, to accuse the Trib of acting vengefully. The Tribune’s editorial page retorted, and under the headline, “Here’s your editorial, Mayor,” said Daley’s talk of revenge was nothing more than an attempt to divert attention from “City Hall cronyism.”

Late last week, the city was still figuring out how much to fine the Tribune Co. for its oversight on the permits.

Rough town, that Chicago. As you can see, they do things differently out there. Looks like they take their disputes pretty seriously. Here, we do lunch.

Orange County has something like 34 mayors, and to my knowledge, The Times thinks every one of them is just swell. I can’t imagine any of them ever accusing us of being vengeful. If they did, the most we’d probably do is ask them to “take it back.”

The closest we come to a feud is with the local district attorney, who usually won’t return our phone calls. Somehow, we still manage to put out a paper.

As for the dispute between Mayor Daley and the company that pays me, I’m siding with the company.

I may not know all the details of the dispute in Chicago, but I do know that the Tribune Co. recently installed “automatic touch dispenser” paper towel machines in our restrooms. Would a vengeful company do something that thoughtful?

No doubt Daley would feel like quite a sap if he knew the company he chided was an industry leader in restroom paper towel convenience.

Quite a story, isn’t it, what with Wrigley Field, falling concrete, missing permits, a suspicious mayor and the super-nice corporate giant that employs me?

I never found out why my Orange County bosses were interested. I can only surmise that, deep down, they’d like to pick a fight with a mayor.

To which I offer them this humble suggestion:

Move to Chicago.

Dana Parsons’ column appears Wednesdays, Fridays and Sundays. He can be reached at (714) 966-7821 or at [email protected].