Aspiring Sitcom Writers Hit the Ultimate Block

Not so long ago, didn’t everyone in Los Angeles have a “Seinfeld” script in a drawer, with that perfect Kramer subplot and an inspired George Costanza diatribe?

This was in the early and mid-1990s, when it was great to be a sitcom writer and not so bad, even, to be an aspiring one. Breaking into the business, or so it seemed, only meant coming up with a good “Seinfeld” or “Cheers” or “Murphy Brown” or “Mad About You” “spec script”--that is, a sample episode of an existing show that a writer would submit to agents and producers to showcase his talents.

For the would-be sitcom writer, the choices were plentiful. In addition to the aforementioned shows, and the cult biz favorite “The Larry Sanders Show,” there were also established family comedies to try writing, including “Roseanne,” “Grace Under Fire” and “Home Improvement.”

Yet today, in another gauge of how few hit comedies have been developed in recent years, the pickings are slimmer--so slim that one of the most popular spec scripts piling up on agents’ and producers’ desks nowadays is “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” a show that airs on pay cable and doesn’t even have scripted dialogue. The HBO series, created by and starring “Seinfeld” co-creator Larry David (who plays “Seinfeld” co-creator Larry David), draws from seven- or eight-page outlines dreamed up by David, while the actors improvise nearly all the lines.

And therein lies the paradox: Sitcom writers emulating a show without sitcom writing.

“They’re basically taking a show whose success is based on that kind of carefully awkward, ad-libbing improv style that makes it seem like real life, and attempting to refabricate it. Having said that, it’s better than reading the thousandth ‘Frasier,’” said Marsh McCall, a former executive producer on the NBC sitcom “Just Shoot Me,” who recently finished a pilot for CBS starring Nia Vardalos.

In short, if viewers aren’t watching newer sitcoms, sensing the dead air behind the laugh tracks, try writing a spec for one of these shows. Some aspiring writers have even resorted in recent years to submitting specs of classic series like “The Mary Tyler Moore Show” or “The Dick Van Dyke Show”--in effect mirroring the behavior of those viewers who choose reruns of vintage shows on cable over the broadcast networks’ attempts at the next new thing.

McCall will be plodding through his share of spec scripts if his pilot gets ordered as a series when the networks announce their new fall schedules next month, as the annual scramble for writing jobs gets underway--a three- to four-week process known as “staffing season.”

It is a job fair that can seem half like a lottery and half like running for student body president. Merit has something to do with employment, but not everything to do with it. Writers already working are at a decided advantage because, as McCall noted, “there is really no substitute for calling someone you trust and saying, ‘You spent a year with this person, how were they?’”

Still, for sitcom writers across the board, job prospects have gotten tougher, amid a downswing in hit shows and budget cutbacks that have reduced the number of seats in a writers’ room. Meanwhile, studios have curtailed many of the lucrative development deals that, three or four years ago, plucked writers from hit shows to develop sitcoms of their own, creating turnover in the process.

In this environment, connections and credits often carry the day, but a good “spec script” can still open doors, insist agents, network executives and producers.

True, there is “Malcolm in the Middle,” “Everybody Loves Raymond” and “The Bernie Mac Show,” to name three. But with fewer universally watched “quality” shows on the air, the process of identifying talent is more muddled.

“I think someone should write a ‘Survivor’ spec,” McCall quipped.

What “Curb Your Enthusiasm” has that most shows don’t, said Lanny Noveck, co-head of the television literary department at the William Morris Agency, is a strong following among those producers in a position to hire new writers. Indeed, while the series isn’t a ratings hit, its milieu practically serves as an autobiography for the TV industry--featuring as it does the inspired antics of a successful and neurotic TV writer as he tries to get through the vagaries of Westside living.

“People in the writing community tend to really respond well to that show,” Noveck said. “You want to be able to have a script that will speak to as many people as possible.”

Or, as others put it, sitcom writers don’t actually like most of what’s on TV (including, at times, their own shows). But they do like “Curb,” with its “Seinfeld”-ian predicaments.

“If you’re a writer and you want to figure out what shows ... other people [in the business] watch, pick ‘Curb,’” said one TV agent, declining to be named.

Still, not everyone would give out that advice. Bruce Helford, executive producer of the ABC sitcoms “The Drew Carey Show” and “The George Lopez Show,” cautions that writing a “Curb” spec “really doesn’t tell producers of these broader-appeal shows what these writers can do in those situations.”

In general, Helford said, “It is a horrible year for finding writers. The scripts I’ve read have been unimaginative.... I think people make one huge mistake. Instead of trying to imitate what they see, they should be trying to make it better. You’ve gotta really love the craft, and I don’t get [that] feeling from any of these writers.”

If ABC renews “George Lopez” and Fox picks up “Wanda at Large,” starring comedian Wanda Sykes, Helford will have three shows on the air next fall. As he scouts for writers, Helford would rather read specs of “Malcolm in the Middle,” “The Bernie Mac Show” or even the long-running “The Simpsons.” “If anybody dares, I will always read a ‘Simpsons,’” he said. “The interaction of the family, the surprising humor.... You can tell if someone can write jokes if they can write a ‘Simpsons.’”

You would not, however, send Helford a spec script of any of the shows he oversees. According to the way things work, a writer pursuing a job on “George Lopez,” say, would not write a “George Lopez” spec. First, producers don’t want to open themselves up to accusations of theft. And they tend to be more proprietary and judgmental when it comes to reading scripts based on their own series.

So what does that leave? Everybody, it seems, is writing an “Everybody Loves Raymond.” While clever and amusing, HBO’s “Sex and the City,” Helford said, “doesn’t have any hard-hitting humor.” The series, with its female look at sexual politics, turns off some executive producers so much they won’t even read a spec for the show, several agents said.

Meanwhile, other shows--NBC’s “Friends” and “Frasier”--are considered either too old or serialized to make for a good spec.

“I always say, ‘Write your favorite show. Write the one you know the best, as long as it’s not completely obscure or it’s only been on for four episodes,’” said Greg Garcia, co-creator and executive producer of the CBS’ “Yes, Dear.”

In his position, Garcia has read a stack of “Raymonds.” An inordinate number of the specs he’s read, Garcia said, involve the Barone kids walking in on Ray and Debra having sex. He’s not sure why.

“People say to me, you must be sick of reading ‘Raymonds.’ No, I’m sick of reading bad ‘Raymonds,’” said Garcia, who broke into the business writing a “Friends” and a “Seinfeld.”

“Curb” is not reading any specs. David, in production on a third season, was unavailable for comment. But if you think you’ve got the perfect script for a “Curb” or a “Malcolm” or anything else, don’t bother. In case you haven’t heard, his show doesn’t have writers.