Stumbling Toward Faux ‘Sirena’s’ Call

In Guillermo Reyes’ “Sirena: Queen of the Tango,� at the Celebration Theatre, the word queen refers to cross-dressing, for there’s nothing regal about the lead character, Sirena (Douglas Steindorff). Nor is there anything commanding about the faux tango dancing in this tangle of a film noir spoof. The three “episodes� that make up this piece are like skits that fail to make a comprehensive whole.

The beginning is promising, with Evan A. Bartoletti’s evocative lighting design and Larry Sousa’s minimalist scenic design setting the mood. A Santa Monica police sergeant (David Shofner) leans against a post with his hat at a rakish tilt and talks about a dame--well, sort of.

Sirena has married to stay in the States, but that’s legal only if Sirena is a woman, which is the subject of debate here. Snappy lines fly but feet don’t. Steindorff as the “Argentinean tango dancing pagan goddess� is unconvincing in all four of those categories. Although Alison Arngrim, of “Little House on the Prairie� fame, is advertised as the female lead, her character doesn’t appear until the last and most muddled episode. Perhaps “lead� here referred to dancing?

There are three types of tango. From the original Argentine tango came American and international styles. Choreographer Brian-Paul Mendoza attempts to pass off some awkward combination of the latter two as the former.

Reyes’ piece shows promise, but this production is ultimately disappointing, particularly when one recalls a more recent camp outing at another venue, “Speed Hedda,� that managed to better incorporate dance into parody.

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* “Sirena: Queen of the Tango,� Celebration Theatre, 7051-B Santa Monica Blvd., West Hollywood. Fridays-Saturdays, 8 p.m.; Sundays 5 p.m. Ends April 1. $20. (323) 289-2999. Running time: 2 hours, 25 minutes.