A School Board Prepared for ‘Animal House’

Joel Robbins of North Hollywood gives PacBell a poor grade in proofreading. Robbins noticed that its Valley directory seems to say that it’s a blackboard jungle out there (see accompanying).

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SPEAKING OF QUALITY: Allen St. James found a company in Ventura that emphasizes something close to it (see photo).

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AS FOR TRASHY MOVIES: Carol Schneider of L.A. came upon just the receptacle (see photo).

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JUST SAY NEIGH: You may recall the suggestion here that USC bring back its old canine mascot, George Tirebiter, and fire the current equine rep, Traveler. My reasoning was that a Trojan horse had brought about a great defeat for Troy a few thousand football seasons ago.

A dissenting voice comes from Leonard Wines, a retired associate vice president of USC.

“Like you, I was troubled by the USC Trojans using a horse as their mascot, considering that a wooden horse enabled the Greeks to wreak havoc on Troy,� he said. “I asked a leading scholar in the USC classics department what her opinion was.

“She said that the horse was the most revered animal in Troy and was very important as a symbol for the Trojans. When you think about it, that’s probably why the Greeks’ gift was in the form of a horse. She confirmed that the horse was most appropriate as a mascot for USC.�

I have to admit I can’t imagine the Greeks giving Troy the wooden figure of a flea-bitten hound like George Tirebiter.

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FAST-FORWARD TO USC, THE MODERN POWERHOUSE: Wasn’t Troy’s take-no-prisoners rout of UCLA something? I’m speaking, of course, of USC’s 48-1 triumph over UCLA in the first-ever Marketing Bowl.

The match pitted a team of six MBA students from USC’s Marshall School of Business against their counterparts from UCLA’s Anderson School of Management.

They were tested on a range of marketing topics, such as: “How much did Nike pay the design student who created their world-famous ‘swoosh’ logo?� Answer: $35.

I’m surprised that UCLA’s disastrous defeat hasn’t prompted local business writers, in the fashion of their colleagues in the sports department, to speculate about a shake-up in the Anderson School of Management.

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STUDENTS WOULD BE TOO OLD FOR THIS JOB: Pat Carlson of Long Beach points out that nannies seem to be getting younger every year (see accompanying).

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ANOTHER SAD IRS STORY: “Kids were holding up signs directing Mission Valley motorists to the [San Diego] Sports Arena for an ‘IRS vehicle liquidation sale’ the other day,� reports San Diego Union-Tribune columnist Diane Bell.

“One San Diegan, thinking the Internal Revenue Service was unloading confiscated cars at bargain prices, swallowed the bait, only to learn upon his arrival that IRS stood for ‘inventory reduction sale’ and was a promotion by an L.A. car dealer.�

Almost makes you question your faith in car dealers.

miscelLAny:

Barbara Thuet of San Diego was delighted to read the item here about the North Hollywood truck driver who rigged his lawn chair with weather balloons and floated to an altitude of 16,000 feet several years ago. By coincidence, her son Max had been asking for information about the daredevil. Thuet wrote me: “You are an infinite source of useless information!�

Thanks! (I think.)

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at [email protected].