LUXURY TOUCHES

It’s the little things that make a house a home--the eight-sided scoreboard, Bose sound system, restaurant serving steak au poivre. But there’s more.

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Bulls versus Bears: Got portfolio anxiety? Wondering if you can cover that insane bet you made on the Lakers? Head to the Bank of America-sponsored cyberstation on the Main Concourse and elbow your way onto the Web. You can check stock quotes and then peep at your dwindling savings account with the online banking service.

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It’s For You: Thanks to the Pacific Bell-sponsored “Wireless Fan Access Hotline,� an attendant toting a cell phone will rush to your seat if your nanny calls to report that little Billy ate a box of crayons. In fact, “anyone who knows your seat number will be able to get to you� through the free service, (213) 742-7FAN, says Sheila Gonzaga, vice president of client services for the arena.

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Red, White and Stogies: The Grand Reserve Club, a membership-only eatery for luxury suite- and Premier seat-holders, features a wine cellar and humidor. In addition to fine cigars and California wines, the staff will gladly add your favorite vin or smoke if you give them two weeks notice. Do tipple in front of the indoor/outdoor fireplace.

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Dear Johns: The bad news is that you don’t get a private bathroom if you pay the $197,500 to $307,500 a year for a luxury suite. The good news is you don’t have to share soap dispensers with the commoners. The public restrooms on the suite levels are ultra-luxe: cherry veneer outer doors open to brushed stainless steel stalls, granite slab counter tops, stainless steel sinks and soft, recessed lighting flattering enough for Blanche DuBois.

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Gentle Persuasion: No in-your-face sponsorship here. Unlike the arena’s omni-splashed namesake, the comfy three-inch cushions in the Premier seats feature a lively yet tasteful motif of a United Airlines logo. Just like home.

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TV Land: There are 1,200 television monitors peppered throughout the center. But unless you’re a luxury suite-holder, you “won’t catch ‘Friends’ here,� says communications director Michael Roth. “Just the game.�