For Girls, a Forum of Their Own

The question was simple, but it got a big reaction from the dozen or so girls sitting in a circle of desks at Laguna Beach High School on Saturday.

Did they think there was someone to whom they could go to talk about their future?

The group--mostly quiet before--spoke up in a chorus: “No.”

The girls and many of their mothers had given up a perfect California day to tackle a weighty subject: preparing girls for the 21st century.

The goal of the event--along with similar conferences sponsored nationwide by the American Assn. of University Women--was to open girls’ eyes to the full range of possibilities before them.

“We need to know more of our options,” said Joy Ostenson, 15. “You hear about the same careers over and over again.”

Alexandra Harman, 15, echoed her Laguna Beach High classmate: “When you go to your school career center you just don’t see choices like ecologist.”

Their comments became part of a plan of action drawn up at the end of the day that will be forwarded to the association’s national headquarters.

Participants suggested that girls learn about career options at an earlier age and that they receive mentoring from working women. They also proposed programs to help teenage girls stay away from drugs and drinking.

Patty Orman, 38, said participating in the conference made her feel as if she was doing something to help her own daughters.

“It’s good to have an event that focuses only on girls,” said the Tustin resident, who came with her 11-year-old daughter, Kimberly.

Clutching a new copy of a book titled “Girltalk: Everything Your Sister Never Told You,” Kimberly said the day was fun.

“It was good,” the seventh-grader said. “I thought about stuff I hadn’t before.”

The day featured separate sessions for the girls and adults. The girls’ sessions, called a Sister to Sister Summit, was a chance for an adult facilitator to find out how the young women saw their options for family, career and life in general.

With the ocean waves crashing against the rocks within view of the school and shouts from a football game in earshot, the girls in attendance stayed focused.

Many of the same issues that have troubled women’s advocates over the years came up in discussion. Some girls expressed a fear of technology. Others wondered out loud whether they could go to medical school and start a family at the same time.

They said appearance still equals popularity and talked about the tremendous competition and pressure in areas ranging from clothes to grades.

In their discussion groups, adults talked about ways to give girls guidance that many thought was lacking when they were young.

Camille Fitzpatrick, a doctor and mother of twins, led a session called “What will the future bring?” She spoke to the girls about the importance of making choices and setting priorities.

“Life, that’s life,” she said. “It’s a series of give-and-takes. You aren’t always going to have things exactly how you want them.”

Hearing older women talk about their lives seemed to make some younger women breathe a sigh of relief.

“It’s so good to hear you say that,” said Sara Fingal, 15. “Sometimes I feel like everyone just assumes where I’m going to school and what I’m going to be. They don’t listen to what I’m saying.”