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CAPSULES AND RANKINGS

Team: 1. Denver (6-1)

Opponent: Kansas City

Comment: At least Broncos know they’ll be in White House come January.

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Team: 2. San Francisco (5-2)

Opponent: at Houston

Comment: Brohm backing up Young is like Phish backing up Streisand.

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Team: 3. Green Bay (6-1)

Opponent: Tampa Bay

Comment: Cheatin’ Cheeseheads dropped for swiping 49ers’ game plan.

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Team: 4. Buffalo (5-2)

Opponent: at New England

Comment: Bills pull it together, score upset--knock off Jets.

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Team: 5. Washington (6-1)

Opponent: Indianapolis

Comment: Dole has better shot of being prez than this lasting.

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Team: 6. Dallas (4-3)

Opponent: at Miami

Comment: Hope someone told Barry there’s a game this week.

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Team: 7. Houston (5-2)

Opponent: San Francisco

Comment: Oversight last week: Call Rams, (314) 982-7267, say Chandler .

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Team: 8. Pittsburgh (5-2)

Opponent: at Atlanta

Comment: Woodson beat deep; good thing Johnson not coaching here.

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Team: 9. Indianapolis (5-2)

Opponent: at Washington

Comment: Faulk’s toe hurts, won’t play until he has his blankie.

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Team: 10. Miami (4-3)

Opponent: Dallas

Comment: News alert--if Dolphins lose, Johnson will fire entire team.

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Team: 11. Minnesota (5-2)

Opponent: Chicago

Comment: Vikings’ story line this year: “Waiting to Exhale.”

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Team: 12. Kansas City (5-2)

Opponent: at Denver

Comment: Marcus Allen has 48 one-yard TDs; he’s in range of Bono’s arm.

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Team: 13. Philadelphia (5-2)

Opponent: Carolina

Comment: Ty Detmer plays big; Pee Wee Herman was a star too.

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Team: 14. Carolina (5-2)

Opponent: Philadelphia

Comment: As Mora said, if you can’t beat Carolina, quit.

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Team: 15. Detroit (4-3)

Opponent: N.Y. Giants

Comment: Wayne Fontes will dress up as a coach for Halloween.

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Team: 16. New England (4-3)

Opponent: Buffalo

Comment: Rookie update: Terry Glenn? She’s doing fine.

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Team: 17. Oakland (4-4)

Opponent: Idle

Comment: Jackie O’s childhood home for sale; same age as Raider playbook.

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Team: 18. San Diego (4-3)

Opponent: at Seattle

Comment: No Humphries, no Seau, no reason to show up.

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Team: 19. Baltimore (2-5)

Opponent: St. Louis

Comment: Edgar Allan Poe: “Don’t link me to these birds.”

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Team: 20. Jacksonville (3-5)

Opponent: at Cincinnati

Comment: Greg Norman disease--Jaguars outgain Rams, 538-204, lose.

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Team: 21. Arizona (3-4)

Opponent: N.Y. Jets

Comment: Game with Jets as good as it gets for Cardinals.

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Team: 22. Seattle (2-5)

Opponent: San Diego

Comment: Seahawks fined for roughness. That’s a step up.

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Team: 23. N.Y. Giants (2-5)

Opponent: at Detroit

Comment: They say Hoffa’s buried in Giants Stadium; Brown can relate.

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Team: 24. Chicago (2-5)

Opponent: at Minnesota

Comment: Is there a better passer in Chicago than Michael Jordan?

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Team: 25. New Orleans (2-5)

Opponent: Idle

Comment: Rick Venturi, 1-10 as an NFL coach, ideal choice to replace Mora.

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Team: 26. Cincinnati (1-6)

Opponent: Jacksonville

Comment: Bruce Coslet’s offense ranks 26th--give him a promotion.

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Team: 27. St. Louis (2-5)

Opponent: at Baltimore

Comment: Brooks has been fired; he just doesn’t know it.

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Team: 28. Tampa Bay (1-6)

Opponent: at Green Bay

Comment: Rhett’s back. Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.

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Team: 29. Atlanta (0-7)

Opponent: Pittsburgh

Comment: A play here and there, and gee, Falcons could be 1-6.

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Team: 30. N.Y. Jets (0-8)

Opponent: at Arizona

Comment: Just remember, people counted out the Yankees too.

THE POLLS: Associated Press and USA Today/CNN--C12