It Figures That They Would Be Squeaky Clean

Do you like the way Disneyland employees look? Then you will love Anaheim Arena workers.

Employees at the arena, home of the NHL’s Mighty Ducks, can forget wearing eyeliner, tattoos and facial hair. But they had better be wearing underwear.

The venue has taken a page from the Walt Disney Co., owner of the Mighty Ducks, and issued an employee handbook that is nothing if not specific in how it expects its workers to look.

Employees can’t wear eyeliner, false eyelashes or eye shadow. They can’t have mustaches, beards, shaved heads or flared or mutton-chop sideburns.

Only one ring per hand is allowed, although wedding sets are OK.

And workers will be required to wear underwear. (Don’t ask. Their bosses will know.)

“The key to the appearance guidelines is to limit the number of distractions,” said John Nicoletti, the arena’s marketing manager. “We want you to enjoy the event, not talk about the usher who had half a shaved head.”

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Trivia time: What heavyweight title fight in this century had the smallest attendance?

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High-rise: The Philadelphia 76ers, who already have 7-foot-6 Minute Bol, might get 7-6 Shawn Bradley with the second pick in the NBA draft.

If so, Jim Reeves of the Ft. Worth Star-Telegram writes: “They could, with some validity, be renamed the Philadelphia Seven-Foot-Sixers.”

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Calm down: Bill Walton has been criticized for his candid remarks as a television basketball commentator. Walton defended his position to Steve Kelley of the Seattle Times.

“I have very, very high standards for the game of basketball. When I don’t see effort, when I don’t see preparation, when I don’t see commitment or passion, that really sets me off.”

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Missing Mario: From an article on Mario Lemieux in the current issue of American Airlines’ magazine, American Way:

“During the National Hockey League finals June 1-14, the eyes of Pittsburgh will once again be on Super Mario . . . hockey fans in Pennsylvania’s steel town will once again watch Penguins star Mario Lemieux cut up the ice.”

Hmmm. Didn’t see him out there.

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Boys will be boys: What was Baltimore Oriole Manager Johnny Oates thinking when he saw his best pitcher, Mike Mussina, end up at the bottom of a pile of players during a brawl with the Seattle Mariners?

“Mussina--don’t get hurt. Mussina--don’t be a hero. Mussina--run,” Oates said. “The next thing I know, he’s dropping his glove and I’m thinking ‘Oh, no.’ ”

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Pressure putts: In regard to Michael Jordan’s gambling, golfer Greg Norman said: “What he does with his money is his own business.”

Norman recalled that when he was an assistant pro in Australia, he survived and learned by gambling on the course.

“When I was making 28 bucks a week, the only way I got to go out and play golf was through gambling,” he said. “It was a great catalyst for me because I learned to play under pressure. There were times when I was playing that I couldn’t afford to lose.”

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Trivia answer: The second Cassius Clay-Sonny Liston fight on May 25, 1965, in Lewiston, Me., with fewer than 3,000 in attendance.

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Quotebook: Tom Weir of USA Today, on George Foreman: “He’s the only man alive who can outtalk Don King and outeat Burger King.”