They Have Their Own Version of the Closing Ceremony for Olympics

Judging from some of the performances I have seen, I believe the International Olympic Committee should consider some new awards for this year’s Games.

--Golden Pacifiers to the U.S. men’s volleyball team, for Whiniest Under Pressure.

--A Silver Urine Container to Gwen Torrence, for the Everyone-Else-Was-Cheating-Because-I-Didn’t-Win event.

--Bronze Pamplona Bullhorns to the Spanish fans, for resolute booing at the pole vault.

--And last but not least, the Bubka Prize (a field of strong contenders for this) for Consistent Egotism in All Sports.

LORA SIGLER, Sherman Oaks