What’s That, Fluffy? You . . . You Say You’re HUNGRY???

Interested in finding out what your dog is really thinking?

Or exchanging witticisms with a butterfly? Or asking your cat if he has any inside information on why the goldfish disappeared?

If these chatty possibilities intrigue you, listen to Lydia Hiby, 33, headliner at this weekend’s cat show at San Diego’s Convention and Performing Arts Center.

For eight years, Hiby has been practicing nonverbal communication with animals at $50 an hour, often for owners desperate to plumb their pets’ intellectual and emotional depths.

“I become the mouthpiece for the animal and give the information to the owner,� Hiby said from her home in Riverside.

She’s got the newspaper clippings to prove it. Also an appearance on “Hard Copy.�

She studied under master animal communicator Beatrice Lydecker. (Perhaps you saw Lydecker on the David Letterman show?)

Hiby says she talked to butterflies in London. She talked to a tarantula. She tried with ants but found they have little to say.

Mostly it’s dogs, cats and horses. She does telephone consultations. She counseled animals of military families during Operation Desert Storm.

If the animals have aches and pains, Hiby says, she begins to feel them in her own body. She gives the animals advice, with mixed results:

“Just because you can communicate with an animal doesn’t mean you can tell it what to do. It’s a lot like talking to children.�

There are believers.

Carolyn Osier of Mission Viejo says she took her cat to Hiby and was told the cat was depressed because she wanted a pink collar. Osier says she bought a pink collar, and now the cat is buoyant.

The rules of journalism require me to inject a note of skepticism.

Here it is: I turned to my cat, Willie, 11, for guidance.

He said he had never heard of Hiby and doubted he would tell her anything important.

When in Sacramento . . .

Political whirl.

* That was then, this is now.

When Mike Gotch was running for the Assembly, he ripped incumbent Jeff Marston as a tool of the development and real estate industries.

“His vote saved his developer friends a bundle, but it hurt our schools,� said one Gotch hit piece. Another listed Marston’s contributions from real estate groups.

Now, Gotch is the incumbent.

And sending friendly letters to realtors--known as big political contributors--pledging to fight a bill that he says will “decimate the real estate industry� by eliminating property-tax deductions for second homes:

“The state budget should not be balanced on the backs of realtors and those who seek to expand the economy by purchasing investment property.�

By the way, the money raised by eliminating second-home deductions would probably be used for schools.

* That’s show biz.

Sonny Bono had to cancel as a headliner at Saturday’s fund-raiser for Assemblywoman Tricia Hunter (R-Bonita).

Reason: This is his weekend to act as maitre d’ at Bono’s, the Palm Springs restaurant he recently sold. It’s part of his agreement with the new owner.

Who Invited Them?

It says here.

* Thanks for the vote of confidence. I guess.

Ralph Pesqueira, owner of El Indio Mexican restaurant, will be honored as a Distinguished Patron at a Boy Scouts of America dinner tonight at the Police Department pistol range.

The dinner will be catered by one of Pesqueira’s biggest competitors: La Casita Mexican restaurant.

* How much has the Mexican attitude toward a binational airport changed?

In February, Ambassador Luis Wybo Alfaro, director general for border affairs, was quoted as saying there was no interest in such a project, no way, no how.

Now he wants San Diego Councilman Ron Roberts to attend a meeting in Houston next week of a U.S.-Mexican border committee so that Roberts’ plan can be fast-tracked.

* North County bumper sticker: “Awanna.�