Businessman Jack Simon, a cousin of Beverly...

Businessman Jack Simon, a cousin of Beverly Hills Mayor Max Salter, attended a dinner party the other night and found himself sitting next to none other than Zsa Zsa Gabor.

Gabor groused about her celebrated tiff with the Beverly Hills police, adding: “I was so angry I phoned the mayor.�

“Oh, really?� Simon said. “The mayor’s my cousin.�

Gabor gave him a strange look, then asked:

“Your cousin’s Tom Bradley?�

A staff member of the Auto Club of Southern California phoned to point out that a recent item in this space incorrectly said that the off-ramp for Forest Lawn Drive is on the Pasadena Freeway. Actually, it’s on the Ventura.

“It’s our job to watch for mistakes like that,� the Auto Club man said.

He added, in mild exasperation: “We’ve sent you people maps.�

O.K., with the grids for all 540 miles of freeways in the county set out before us, we start a new feature:

What Drivers Do on the Freeway While Driving.

Entry No. 1:

Monday morning, a motorist on the Pasadena Freeway was observed playing on his French horn while going about 45 m.p.h. Traffic was a bit too noisy to evaluate the serenade.

Coming so soon after the Olympic steroid scandal, it might seem like an unlikely name for a sporting event:

“Ben Johnson’s Pro-Celebrity Rodeo.�

Actually, the dishonored Canadian sprinter isn’t involved. This Ben Johnson is the horseman/actor (“Last Picture Show�), and his charity fund-raiser is set for Aug. 13 in the L.A. Equestrian Center in Burbank.

It should be noted, however, that the show’s horses are mighty fast in the 100-meter dash.

It’s a bar, with a jukebox, etc. And it’s got art--a play, “The Skin Man,� is being staged there, as well as such other nightly events as No Talent Night.

That’s why Al’s Bar downtown claims membership in a new genre:

It’s an art bar.

No one will ever accuse the Sierra Madre News of being unpatriotic.

The San Gabriel Valley weekly devoted so much coverage to the town’s Fourth of July Parade that it was forced to run this note:

“Sierra Madre City Council proceedings from Tuesday evening will appear in next week’s edition of the News. Because of the myriad pictures featured this week, room became a problem. Thank you for your indulgence. . . . “

Is there honor among thieves? A household on Ximeno Avenue in Long Beach hopes so. They’ve set out a sign on their front lawn that says: “Please Return Our Pelican Statue.�