Some Way to Treat a Guest

When Archie Manning was a quarterback for the New Orleans Saints, he ran a summer football camp in Alabama where, one summer, he brought in Terry Bradshaw of the Pittsburgh Steelers as a guest instructor.

Here’s how the dialogue went as Manning, with Bradshaw at his side, told his pupils of some bad habits he had observed:

Manning: “One bad habit is taking a false step forward when you take the snap from center.”

Bradshaw: “I do that.”

Manning: “Quarterbacks also tend to look at the ground when they drop back in the pocket.”

Bradshaw: “I do that.”

Manning: “Another bad habit is patting the football before throwing the pass.”

Bradshaw: “I do that.”

Manning: “So you see, if you have these bad habits, all you’ll do is win 4 Super Bowls. If you don’t, maybe you’ll go 8 for 8.”

Add Manning: “The year I was drafted, the Saints’ No. 2 choice was Sam Holden, a tackle from Grambling,” he told Sports Illustrated. “Dan Dierdorf was still left when they took Sam. I told my wife, ‘Wow, this guy must really be something. They picked him ahead of Dierdorf.’ Dan’s a guy who gets beat about once a semester.

“Sam was down with a hamstring his first year. I’d watch him running laps, and he was running them slower than I could walk. I nicknamed him Sudden Sam.

“The second year he played in our next-to-last exhibition game against the Steelers in Memphis, sort of a homecoming for me. Sam pitched a no-hitter against L.C. Greenwood that night. I’d take my 7-step drop, and L.C. was back there waiting for me.”

Says Chicago Bulls rookie center Will Perdue, who wears size 18 AAAAAAAAAA sneakers that cost $150 a pair: “If somebody is going to rob me, they’d be better off taking my shoes than my wallet.”

From Alan Goldstein of the Baltimore Sun: “Legendary Boston Celtic sportscaster Johnny Most has tried in vain to shake his smoking addiction.

“He recalls the time he tried snuffing a cigarette during a broadcast and gave himself a hotfoot. Play-by-play man Glenn Ordway saw Most stamping like mad and whispered, ‘If you’ve got to go, I’ll cover for you.’ And Most shot back, ‘You idiot, I don’t have to go to the john. My foot’s on fire.’ ”

Trivia Time: What do quarterbacks Mark Rypien of the Washington Redskins and Ricky Turner of the Indianapolis Colts have in common? (Answer below.)

According to USA Today, NBC analyst Larry Csonka got off this one during the Miami-Indianapolis telecast: “I never held for a kicker but I held one up. I stuffed Garo Yepremian into an airplane luggage rack.”

Trivia Answer: They were teammates at Washington State in 1983.

Quotebook

Jerry Reynolds, Sacramento Kings coach, signing off his radio show: “I’m Jerry Reynolds, and aren’t you glad you’re not?”