Tough Love for Teen-Agers

Are you “helping” a teen-ager, sheltering and feeding a teen-ager “whose parents don’t understand them, who don’t understand that a little pot or alcohol is used when they are stressed out”?

Have you heard them say, “I’m looking for a job” or “It’s not my fault” or “Everyone blames me, and I was just standing there” or “It’s all the teacher’s fault, he didn’t explain it, that’s why I got an F”?

Well, the public is not helping them one bit. Teen-agers who use drugs and/or alcohol are breaking the law and people are enabling them if they give them shelter. There are some parents who have given up, but not those who live the Tough Love way. They are good, hard-working, caring parents who want their children to dissociate themselves from drugs and the “friends” who condone this debilitating life style.

They are parents who want their children to become useful, healthy and self-reliant adults with goals, who are motivated and have good self-esteem.

Tough Love parents meet once a week, networking with one another, giving one another the strength and guidance needed to keep their lives in control. They learn how to guide their children and get professional help.

Instead of giving the teen-agers sympathy and sheltering them and saying “poor Jane” or “poor Jim,” urge them to be in control of their lives. Get help from a professional, a priest, rabbi, minister or any adult that is involved in drug or alcohol prevention at the high schools or teen counselors at school.

Urge them to talk to their parents. Their parents want to help, they love their children, believe me, or they wouldn’t be spending their time at Tough Love.

Parents, your children need your help and understanding. Give them your undivided attention. Some of them are screaming for help. Listen, and whatever you do, keep in control, be a good role model. You can’t expect your children to live a drug-free life if you don’t.

LOUISE BURBANK

GLORIA FAHEY

Newport Beach

Also signed by 10 other parents involved in Tough Love program.